Debbie Downer Analyzes the 2009 Saints Schedule
The air in Who Dat Nation is electric following the release of their 2009 schedule last night. The scheduling gods have looked down upon New Orleans and apparently they have delivered us a schedule that we should be happy with.
But there's one Saints fan who is still not satisfied with the Saints schedule...Debbie Downer. Even I was actually breaking out of my self-imposed, cautiously optimistic cocoon until I listened to what she had to say about next seasons lineup and brought me back down to Earth. Check it out.

"Sure this will be Pierre Thomas' best season ever. Until he blows out his knee in week three."
"You're enjoying your day. Everything's going your way. Then along comes Deb-bie Downer. Always there to tell you 'bout a new disease. A car accident or killer bees. You'll beg her to spare you, Debbie please! But you can't stop Debbie Downer!"
Awesome 2009 schedule fact that everyone is excited about: We don't have a division game until November!
Debbie Downer says: "By the time the Saints have to play their important games half the team will already be on IR and the rookies will have hit the wall. At least Charles Grant and Will Smith will be back from their suspensions just in time to under perform."
Awesome 2009 schedule fact that everyone is excited about: We have five games against rookie head coaches!
Debbie Downer says: "The Saints were 2-2 against rookie coaches last season. Not really what I call comforting."
Awesome 2009 schedule fact that everyone is excited about: Eli Manning is making his triumphant homecoming for the first time since entering the NFL!
Debbie Downer says: "Eli will probably be so amped about this game that he'll torch the Saints for 500 plus yards and four touchdowns. Can't wait."
Awesome 2009 schedule fact that everyone is excited about: We don't have any cold weather games like in Chicago.
Debbie Downer says: "'Numbs the Word!' says The Farmers Almanac for the 2009 winter. In fact, they are 'forecasting a "numbing" winter, with below-average temperatures for at least two-thirds of the country.' Those late-season games in Washington and Carolina might not be so toasty afterall.
Awesome 2009 schedule fact that everyone is excited about: We have three primetime games!
Debbie Downer says: "Great. That just means those weeks are shorter and the Saints have less time to prepare for the following game. That will turn out well."
Awesome 2009 schedule fact that everyone is excited about: We open up the season against the 0-16 Detroit Lions! Automatic win!
Debbie Downer says: "The Lions' winless record last season means nothing in 2009. It's a new season. Every year the NFL has a Cinderalla team that surprises everyone and the Lions are primed to be that team. Besides, they have to win sometime. It's a trap."
Awesome 2009 schedule fact that everyone is excited about: We get to play the Cowboys in primetime again and whoop their butt!
Debbie Downer says: "We got rid of Mike Karney."
Awesome 2009 schedule fact that everyone is excited about: We don't have to travel an ocean just to play a game in London.
Debbie Downer says: "The Saints won that game. They ought to play more of those games."
0 recs |
11 comments
|
Comments
very clever, and entertaining
But it’s going to take a lot to dampen my enthusiasm for 2009. Superbowl Saints!
"The best hope for David to make the final roster is for the Saints to select players at other positions in the draft."- Jeff Duncan, T-Pic 4/8/09
by stujo4 on Apr 15, 2009 9:38 AM CDT reply actions 0 recs
Debbie Downer Rules!!! Haha!
Schedule will be awesome if we win….but Really Blow!!! if we lose 4! times on not just national but international TV (american sports channel will bring those live here in Europe)
by shecky on Apr 15, 2009 11:28 AM CDT reply actions 0 recs
Debbie Downer
Excuse my language but all I can say is BITCH…..lol
by Realsaint on Apr 15, 2009 11:52 AM CDT reply actions 0 recs
Rachel Dratch is sooooo hot!
Well, maybe not in the traditional beauty sort of way, but she sure is funny.
Debbie can’t get me down. I’m psyched for the new season. Getting our hopes up only to see them crushed before our very eyes by around week 14 is all part of being a Saints fan.
Go Saints!!!! Deuce may be gone, but he will never be forgotten.
by satchmo26 on Apr 15, 2009 2:06 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
Guys, I believe (and I hope) that Miss Jane is still with us here on Da Chronic, so let’s all stop acting like 8th graders. (I say that after I got my posts done.)
"The best hope for David to make the final roster is for the Saints to select players at other positions in the draft."- Jeff Duncan, T-Pic 4/8/09
by stujo4 on Apr 15, 2009 3:32 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
Oh who are you kidding?
I am sure that there is very little that we could come up with that Miss Jane couldn“t deal with.
by shecky on Apr 15, 2009 5:19 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Indeed.
I have said much worse about both Miss Dratch and Miss Helmsley in my day.
My only complaint with the schedule is that both NY games are at home. I was hoping to catch a game this year, but apparently the NFL does not take the needs of displaced fans into account. :(
by janepriceestrada on Apr 15, 2009 8:25 PM CDT up reply actions 0 recs
Debbie Downer needs
a Puppy Upper (for all you old SNL fans)………Who-Dat Super Bowl season….Peace
You think you know, and you don't know, and you never, ever will know..Jim Mora Sr.
by metryman on Apr 15, 2009 4:47 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
We have a fantastic home schedule
And I love the 3 prime time games being in the Dome!
by AppleCub on Apr 15, 2009 6:47 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
Debbie Downer can
kiss the fattest part of my hairy ass. Opponent wise, it’s a tough schedule. However, travel wise it’s not that bad. I’m so happy we don’t have to go to Chi-town in December again.
Already know you that which you need.
by dicecar18 on Apr 15, 2009 8:22 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs
fast start
I feel very optimistic about this season if we get a fast start and a little momentum going after the bye week. also…can’t have too many injuries
Superbowl bound!!!...I hope? Go Saints! :D
by skinnykinney on Apr 15, 2009 10:17 PM CDT reply actions 0 recs



















