FanPost

Sean Payton Cheat Sheet

 

Have you ever experienced a puzzled, confused feeling while listening to an NFL coaches dialog with the media?  Well, the cat’s out of the bag.  I think I have broken the code that NFL coaches across the league have been using during press conferences.  This is just a partial list but offers a sample matrix of what we hear and how we can process it.

The code is actually quite simple.  Choose a number from the first column, a number from the second column, then a number from the third column.  Example:

Q:  “Coach, how are you preparing for the upcoming game?”

A:  “We are concentrating on (1) aggressive (10) game plan (5) theatrics.  It’s worked for us before.”

See, easy huh?  1, 10, 5.  Chose any random three numbers and you can hold a press conference like a pro!

Q:  "Coach, how are you handling the multiple injuries to your secondary?"

A:  "By encouraging energetic defensive options (1, 2, 4)."  Bing, bang, boom.  Conference over!  Try it.

 

(Note:  Numbers 11 can only be used together for maximum vagueness.)



1.  Aggressive           1.  Offensive               1.  Attitude

2.  Concerted            2.  Defensive               2.  Playcalling

3.  Determined          3.  Special Teams      3.  Effort

4.  Energetic             4.  Running                  4.  Options

5.  Proven                  5.  Passing                  5.  Theatrics

6.  Overbearing         6.  Huddle                    6.  Antics

7.  Suppressive         7.  Sideline                  7.  Planning

8.  Optimal                 8.  Goal line                 8.  Performance

9.  Excessive             9.  Crowd                     9.  Reactions

10.  Victorious           10.  Game plan           10.  Results

11.  It is                      11.  what                     11.  it is.

This FanPost was written by a reader and member of Canal Street Chronicles. It does not necessarily reflect the views of CSC and its staff or editors.

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