clock menu more-arrow no yes

Filed under:

Plot to take over Da Chronic enters its final phase

New, comments
You made a mistake, my friend. No blogger would go on his honeymoon carrying his air conditioner.
You made a mistake, my friend. No blogger would go on his honeymoon carrying his air conditioner.

So...

It's been nearly a year, and finally my nefarious plan is coming to fruition. My assistant Erin has played his part flawlessly...Dave suspects nothing. And I? I merely have insinuated myself into Saintsational's most trusted inner circle, eliminated my main rival Stujo4, and put myself into position to launch the most fiendish plan in the history of the Crescent City (at least, since the re-election of Mayor Nagin...I had nothing to do with that one, I assure you, but I admire its elegance. Yes.)

Now, from my secret lair in the Old City Ice House, I am prepared to take over Canal Street Chronicles for good...or evil, as the case may be. Because once the power of the Blogosphere is in my hands, I will inaugurate a little war. In a matter of hours, Sports Illustrated and Yahoo will have annihilated each other. We shall see a new power dominating the world!

But not just yet. First, I must pronounce some new rules...

To begin with, a change in the terms of service would be appropriate: all members must swear eternal fealty to my rule (you also get a free newsletter). Those who refuse will be banished to The Falcoholic, until I can think some more gruesome punishment. Come to think of it, I can't...to the Falcoholic you go.

Second, you must all make Canal Street Chronicles your home page. To do this, click on the icon at the top of the page that says "Submit to Evil Overlord" (beside "My Blogs).

Third, and most important, you must all drink the Kool-Aid (this week's flavor is grape). No more "cautious optimism"...your lukewarm, pusillanimous and cunctatory attitudes will no longer be tolerated! We shall triumph against all who dare to stand against us...so get with the frickin program already.

Finally, a personal message to coldpizza: do not try to stop me. There will be no Alexander Haig moment for you, my friend...and should you attempt to manufacture one, I look forward personally to exterminating you.

That is all. Happy blogging!