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Rolling With The Punches: Seven Saints and Their Professional Boxing Counterparts

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Let’s take a look at seven New Orleans Saints players and their respective professional boxing counterparts.

Geoff Burke-USA TODAY Sports

You know what isn’t fun? The time between the end of the Super Bowl and the beginning of the league year in March. You know what is fun? Making meaningless comparisons!

Good news, everyone! Boy, do I have some meaningless comparisons for you! Let’s take a look at seven New Orleans Saints players and their respective professional boxing counterparts. Why seven, you ask? Did five seem like to little and yet was I too lazy to come up with ten? Possibly, but I’ll just say it was on purpose, to go along with the seven original boxing weight classes.

Marques Colston /Felix Sturm: He has had a very solid, if unheralded professional career. In his prime, he always seemed to be near the top in his position/division, but never really in the conversation on the bigger scale among casual fans. He may now be past his prime, but he still has the talent and maybe just enough gas in the tank to make another potential run.

Curtis Lofton/Paulie Malignaggi: He may not be the strongest, he may not be not the fastest, but he sure has a real mind for the game and the effort is never lacking. Curtis Lofton seems to always be around the ball, the same way that Malignaggi always seems to be around the title picture. Sure, he doesn’t always win, but he’s there and puts up a hell of a fight. Unspectacular? Yes. Solid? You bet your sweet booty.

Jimmy Graham/Victor Ortiz: Overall, he has a very impressive young career, especially when you just look at the numbers on paper. However, he has shown problems with disappearing on the big stages and sometimes seems to lack a true heart for the sport. He clearly has top level talent, but seems to let things get in his head when things are not going his way.

Keenan Lewis/Sam Soliman: He tends to be underrated or even unknown by a lot of casual fans, but also a little overrated by his strongest supporters. It’s true that he has been beat a few times (including some head scratchers), but he can give fits to even the best of them, at times. While he may not have looked so good the last time we saw him, there are reports of him playing/fighting with an injury.

Junior Galette/Adrien Broner: He likes to talk. A lot. While he had a good start to his career, he recently hit a setback after the big money seemed to be on its way (or already paid, in Junior’s case). The recent setback did not stop the trash talk though and he could probably use some humbling. He is still young enough to turn things back around and the talent is there, but is the mind and willingness to learn there, too? That remains to be seen.

Drew Brees/Floyd Mayweather Jr: At this point, he truly transcends his sport. While there may be signs of physical decline (the extent of which is debatable), he understands the sport so well that he can compensate to remain at the top… and let’s be honest, it’s not like he relied heavily on pure physical ability to get where he is. While he probably has enough money and name power to retire, he seems to truly love the sport and competition, and always seems to be one of the hardest workers in the offseason/between fights.

Patrick Robinson/Eric Crumble: One word: Horrible. A lot of you probably haven’t heard of Eric Crumble, here is all you need to know; his professional career is 0-31, all 31 losses by knockout. While Patrick Robinson has had a play here or there (just like Crumble landed a few punches), it always seems to end the same. Just like Eric Crumble was a punching bag for middleweights in the Midwest, Patrick Robinson is a punching bag for commenters on CSC.

Now, I was going to end this by comparing myself with Bert Sugar, but I have to be brutally honest with myself, we aren’t even remotely on the same level… I’m clearly the far superior writer and historian.